First off with the boo, I found out monday that I have a hernia. Doesn't really hurt, but it will only get worse unless I get surgery. I spent nearly 7 hours at the hospital which of course was a pain in the ass. Then they gave me friggin morphine which DIDN'T need! Made things worse for me -_-...Which as of today I am in the process of being insured Just gotta wait another 10 days for it to be official. Then I can look into being insured once and for all. Only about $60 a month to be covered isn't that bad. I don't even remember the last time I had insurance lol.

Enough of the bad news. On to the Woo! I finally got my license. I passed my friggin test and am officially a legal driver...I just wish this came at a better time. I had to pass my test still feeling the after effects of the morphine and dealing with my hernia which really isn't bad unless I am on my feet for too long.

Finally made it pass a major bump in the road. Now my next step is to look for a car that I, myself can purchase

Everytime I look at you now I get this sharp pain in my chest. This pain I know is the result of all the anger and frustration I have pent up inside of me as a result of what you have done to me...and what you continue to do to me. There is no need to go into detail all that you have done. Just that you have taken a lot more from me than just money. You have taken my freedom and at times my will to live. Simply just from what you did. Every time you deny it, it will only hurt you and myself more.

You're a mother fucking addict! And though telling you this to your face will only result in useless arguing and me probably getting kicked out, so I promise the day I move out of your home. I will tell you this to your face. Until then I will simply use you as a motivator in getting out of here. Getting my license and a car should be cake. I plan on having all that taken care of by august. I'm done having to worry about my belongings getting taken. My eyes are swelling up with tears as a result of this frustration. You made our sister feel like shit because she wanted to believe you where getting better. Fuck that. You're going to continue to use until the day you die. Just like our mother...You're a disgrace and I am tired of taking care of you. By taking care of you I simply mean you stealing money from me for your fucking addictions.

Why do you cry to me when you are in pain? You expect me to pick up all the pieces and put you together again. You don't even give me a fucking chance to have a legitimate conversation with you, yet you tell me no one cares about me. I'm going to do "Irreversible" things -_- I know exactly what it is like to be on the verge of committing suicide and after listening to you I feel like doing something stupid to myself. You put me in a real shitty mood and not to sound mean, I'm trying ever so hard to avoid anymore drama that you sisters throw at me. I am the youngest one out of us 3, but at times it seems like I am the only one with their screws still attached.

I wish you could be in my shoes and watch the ones you looked up to for so long start to deteriorate just like I had to witness with both of my parents. This is fucking bull shit! I just want to get the fuck away from them right now, but I have been anchored down by them for so long, that I don't even fucking remember what it is like to be free anymore! Yes, they took care of me after losing both my parents and I have showed them my appreciation more than enough times. On top of that loaned them a shit ton of money only to get bitched at me when asking to get some of it back. I seriously need to get away from them.

I need my freedom more than ever right now. I've dealt with enough bull shit in life to know when things are not worth fixing and my relationships with my sisters are starting to look like they will never be whole again. At least not until they both get over their personal addictions and when they finally decide to pay me back for all the money I so stupidly loaned them in the past. I've been nothing but a welcome mat for them to step all over me in the past. Not anymore. I'm done doing them favors. I'm done being the nice guy I try ever so hard to be! It's all been a waste of fucking effort!

I've always been one to preach the saying, "Life's not fair". But this situation really isn't fair. Especially considering everything I had to go through up until this point. I've seen parents nearly dead, waste away, and become living corpses. You'd think that there would be a light at the end of the tunnel but unfortunately there is never a light. The light is something you have to create yourself so it seems and if that is the case I have my light lit and know what path I need to take to get the hell out of here. I just need to take one step at a time and push myself when times get rough. My path is simple when written down at least...I'm going to continue to work all the hours that I can get. To save up for a car and get my license in the process. Seek a better paying job if possible or find a roommate and get the fuck out of my sisters reach once and for all! I love my sisters, but they have been holding me down for a very long time now. It's time I learn what it's like to be free again!